Information about TBOX12...

Meet The Interns!
We are pleased to present you with the Official TBOX12 interns, pictured below, Abby, Riky, and Nikki!   Following in the pioneering footsteps of last year's interns, Virginia and Michelle (to be featured soon!), these 3 gals will be assisting me all day and handling anyone who gets out of line.

Did you know...???  that the very first TBOX, back in 1996, didn't start until 4:00PM - a full 6 hours later than it does today?  Why, you ask?  Our inspiration was the Super Bowl... and the way the pre-game shows and festivities and hype start earlier, and earlier, and earlier every year, until they've become the bloated behemoth they are today -- and that's exactly what we want to be! :)  And at TBOX1, no one showed up until 4:20... and there were a grand total of 3 people at the first bar!

Did you know...???  that the term wire-to-wire originally came to my attention from my old friend Pete, a die-hard Cincinnati Reds fan, who despite their recent decade and a half of stinking, used to boast incessantly about how they went "wire to wire" when they won the World Series in 1990 (being in first place, every day, from Game 1 to Game 162, never falling out) -- this just stuck in my head, and, when I started TBOX, I began to apply it to the act of going from Bar 1 to Bar 12 at TBOX, from beginning to end, from wire to wire!

Did you know...??? that our other business is making t-shirts sold in over 450 stores nationwide!  Visit www.shopfesta.com -- all TBOX participants will get a great discount on Festa apparel, which makes great gifts for all the women in your life... like say, our world-famous Chicago Girl shirt...



Crawlin' for the Very First Time?
As per our tradition, we will want to make sure and "call you out" to ensure you are treated with the proper respect, guidance, and gentle touch.  Thusly, we present the new, improved TBOX Virgin stickers shown below!  If you have NEVER BEEN TO TBOX BEFORE, then you'll get one and we ask you to wear it proudly.  We made 1,000 of these... so, there will HOPEFULLY be enough to go around.  And please, we keep records, DO NOT TRY to wear one if you've been before - yes, even one bar of one previous tbox, and you're not a virgin anymore.

Did you know...???  Before we got all fancy and made badges, we just wrote numbers on people's hands with a big old permanent marker.  It all started at TBOX3 when we decided to count how many people had showed up (it was around 350 that year, 1998) - we continued with the numbers on the hands through TBOX6, before we switched to the badges.  Below is a dramatized re-enactment of what the numbers looked like back in the old days...

Did you know...???  At TBOX2, in 1997, I didn't bother to call any of the bars beforehand -- we then found out during the crawl that Bar #2 actually wasn't open at the time we got there! (around 445pm).  So, technically, that was just an EBOX that year.  (Don't worry -- we called all the bars in July & August this year and have been in continuous contact!)

TBOX Background Information Snippet: What Is The Deal with the Cereal??
Aaah, a common query of first-timers -- why on earth do we ask people to bring CEREAL to the bar crawl??  Well, it's a long story, going back to 10th grade in Vero Beach... in order to initiate me, the "cool kids" made us drink an entire bucket filled with green beer an topped off with an entire box of Lucky Charms. We had to eat/drink it as fast as possible. You can imagine the results later.

 

Anyway, a few years later after college, I was out at a bar with friends and for fun, we took a box of Lucky Charms with us. EVERY GIRL in the place came up asking us for cereal :) -- anyway, moving to Chicago, I decided doing cereal shots -- and the sugar rush associated with cereal -- was a great "innocent" way to have fun without emphasizing excessive drinking (but similar in form and excitement to doing an "upside down" margarita. Anyway, cereal (cap'n crunch, froot loops, trix, count chocula, etc...) have been an integral part of Festa events ever since...

Throughout the event, you will see cereal flying EVERYWHERE, and will be asked at some point to "do a shot". We encourage you to bring a box of your favorite SWEET and AERODYNAMIC cereal. The only rule is that it must have NO FIBER and LOTS OF SUGAR!

TBOX Historical Perspective... TBOX3 (1998)

December 5, 1998 was one of the big days in TBOX History.  TBOX1 and TBOX2 were cute, intimate little affairs (approx 60 and then 80 attendees per...), but things "jumped up a notch" the next year.  Thanks to this newfangled invention called "E Mail", all sorts of folks got word of our little shindig, and the buzz was on the street.  And when I woke up that Saturday (a little after 1 O'Clock or so ... that's right, TBOX didn't start until 4PM back then!!), I noticed, "hey, it's not freezing out" -- and not only was it not freezing, it was SEVENTY DEGREES (notice no coats in the picture below).  Bill, Goze, and a few other friends came over to my old apartment on Wrightwood about 330, we had a few peanut-butter-and-banana sandwiches, and headed out. This spring-like balminess brought EVERYBODY out of the woodwork, and as we arrived at Bar #1, we found, like, 100 people or so were there already!  We said, "Let's Count 'em!" But how?  Let's write on everyone's hand with a marker!  By the time we made it from Goose Island Clybourn, thru Lincoln Park, and to the former Gaslight Corner on Halsted, it was still crazy-warm, and we'd counted about 350 souls.  Some people even got crazy and wore Santa Hats!  And we signed certificates for people who had gone "wire to wire". And everyone said, "Great job, Chris!  This just can't possibly get any bigger though!" :)

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TBOX Historical Perspective... TBOX10 (2005)
When I look back at the TBOX's thru the years, I usually segment them as such: "The Baby TBOXs" (1&2), "Carefree & Triumphant" (3&4), "TBOXs in Exile" (5&6 - explanation later), "The Glorious Return" (7), "Growing Pains" (8&9), and "Domination" (10&11).  TBOX10 was the first year where I felt like a big chunk I've what I'd wanted the event to become, was finally being put into place, and the "TBOX brand" was really getting established (and i didn't even go to business school!) -- this was the last year when we had the Opening Torch Procession Ceremony starting at my old house in Wrigleyville and going to Bar #1, and the year of one of our most charismatic and celebrated #1's, Mr. Tony Yaniz.  It was also the first year of the Bullhorn, the first year of badges I really liked and thought looked cool, and the first year when Royal Court-hood really started to be a big deal.  On this crisp, brisk, snowy day, it all "locked in", and for many of you coming this year, was your first TBOX.  Here's to you, TBOX10... (more TBOX10 pix here!)

TBOX Historical Perspective... TBOX5, 6, and 7
As I'd mentioned, TBOX 5 and 6 were the "TBOX's in Exile"...  what's the story with that?  Well, after the fun of TBOX's 3 and 4, the advent of the millennium had brought me some personal challenges and difficulties... most namely, I had foolhardily decided to leave my cushy lair of Chicagodom to go to work for a dot-com in Silicon Valley ("social wasteland"), where I toiled long nights and weekends, living in a hotel room in San Jose (just a step up from a "van down by the river"), and my trips back to Chicago, the fun, and the friends, growing ever more distant, like the shining blue marble of the earth seen from the surface of the moon.  With the job turmoil, the dot-com bust, the stock market crash, 2 lost loves, my car being impounded, towed, and crushed, and a lot of other weird stuff going down, as the Fall of 2000 rolled around, the big question was, "Will there still be a TBOX?"  I floated the idea to some friends to see if they were still interested in attending, and the answer was a resounding YES.  So, I made a few calls, flew back around early November to talk to some bars, and made it happen... and TBOX5 drew around 800-900 people.  A year later, in the somber afterglow of 9/11, and me now wandering the streets of L.A., now unemployed, again the question arose, would there be a TBOX6?  Wouldn't not having it be letting the terrorists win?  Again, making calls from California and sending out emails, then flying in and crashing on my friend Danahy's couch, the show went on, and somehow the web site Metromix had picked up and featured the event, and listed it, with my cell # as the # to call for information!  All day Friday it rang with questions from strangers, and something around 1500 people showed up!

A Couple of the Few Remaining Photos from TBOX5 & TBOX6

Fast-forward to the Spring of 2002, and I'd moved back to Chicago (it's a long story)... and after being carefree and happy throughout the 90s, then suddenly disenfranchised, I wondered being back in Chicago, "Would anyone remember me?", "Would anything still be the same?"  Was it all over for me on the North Side?   Was it just going to be Job-Wife-Kids-Naperville???  Well, it seems everywhere I went that summer, street fairs, parties, ballgames, people I didn't know or barely knew were coming up to me on the street, saying "You're the TBOX Guy!" "Oh my Gosh, I had the best time ever???"  "When is it this year?" "Can't wait!"  And... I knew it was good to be home.  Like George Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life, my time in exile had given me a chance to see what the world would be like if TBOX had never been born, and frankly, it was a world I didn't like much.  So as Fall of 2002 approached, I was like, "we are going full on, pedal to the medal, take no prisoners, all out this year..." (and more of the strung-out hyperbolic adjectives you now find on our t-shirts) -- and TBOX7 was a glorious triumph -- around 1800 people, the first year of Badges, the first year of "The Frame", me living right next to the crawl route, bars called in advance to arrange specials, 14 of my friends flying in and staying with me from out of town for the weekend, it was one for the ages -- and laid the groundwork for "The Modern TBOXes" you see today.  Here's to you, TBOX7!!!  (More pix from TBOX7... Click Here)

TBOX Historical Perspective... TBOX1 and TBOX2

December 1996... seems like a long time ago, doesn't it?  Close your eyes and try to remember... there were NO CELL PHONES... maybe a handful of people had them and they were as big as military walkie-talkies.  ALMOST NO ONE had e-mail... and there was no MySpace, no YouTube, no Text Messages... yep, if you wanted to communicate with someone, you, like, had to CALL THEM AT HOME and if you wanted to meet somebody somewhere, you had to BE ON TIME and really stick to it!  It was amidst these primitive conditions that the idea for TBOX was born.  For those who knew me back in the day, starting in 1994, I hosted a "little party" in my Lincoln Park apartment called "Festapalooza" -- man, those were fun parties, but within a few years, with my crib being destroyed, neighbors and landlord hating me, it was time to look at doing something OUTSIDE the house... so the bar crawl was the logical place to turn, and I'd heard of this "12 bars of Xmas" idea... so I put the word out to my Accenture co-workers, and the date was set.  As is now stuff of legend, just 2 of my friends showed up at the first bar, making the whole crawl a grand total of Three People.  By the end, we were 60 or so strong, and the next year, when we decided to do it again, we probably touched the 80 mark or so.  Enjoy the pix below and honor our humble beginnings!!!

Historic Photo of Don, Chris, Ty on 14 December 1996, Goose Island Clybourn, 4:52PM

A Little Later in TBOX1

The End of TBOX1 (Note TBOX10 #1 Tony Y, Center)


The Beginning of TBOX2, December 13, 1997 (Note 1B Goze and 1C Bill Ford)

Later in TBOX2

TBOX Fact... What is the "Royal Court" and How Do You Get On It???
The TBOX Royal Court are the Honored VIP Guests, who will be wearing the TOP 40 Badge Numbers, #0001 thru #0040, the elite, the cream of the crop, the best of the best, the top >1% of the entire TBOX.  How did they get this tremendous honor??  Well, the key element is that rare quality of unbridled, un-ironic enthusiasm and dedication to TBOX over the years.  People who look forward to it all year, talk about it, plan for it, and bring their "A Game" on game day and leave it all on the playing field.  Also, a lot of the people you'll see on the RC are those who have really been there for me throughout the years, and this is my way to show my appreciation.  And, it doesn't hurt to ask and let me know you want it!!!  Many of the people you see below came up to me at street fests and other events over the summer and said, "I should be on the Royal Court..." -- and presented their case.  Also, I'm always on the lookout for talent.  And a lot of the people you see below have also been to 4,5,8, or even all 11 of the previous TBOX's, they fly in every year from Atlanta or New York or Minneapolis just for TBOX every year, they dress as boy scouts or girl scouts or giant lemons, they buy me drinks, tell me how cool i am, you get the picture!!! :)

The Badge Numbers just started as a way to count people, until they realized, "Hey, it's pretty cool to be #1, or #2, to have a low number... and by TBOX7, we graduated from writing on people's hands to the badges you see today.

TBOX Badges Throughout the Years... Counterclockwise from Bottom Left: TBOX7,8,9,10,11

Once we started with the badges at TBOX7, people really started noticing the numbers... and as the event grew, it went from the Top 10 being cool, to the Top 20, to 30, and now, the Top 40 badges numbers are deemed as the Royal Court you see today.  In addition to the badges, each RC member will have a custom license plate they'll be wearing on a gold chain (see below) -- and all have several hundred of their own UNIQUE STICKERS to collect!  As you make your way thru TBOX, try to find all the RC members, get one of their stickers, and take your picture with them!!  You'll see some of the games and contests next week, based on finding people with certain badges numbers or combinations of badges.

TBOX12 Royal Court License Plate

MEET THE ROYALS, Part One
Get to know some of the VIPs from TBOX12...

Fujimoto (#3 FOR LIFE)
First TBOX: TBOX7 (2002)
Qualifications: HA!!!  Like this needs any explanation.  He is the all-knowing, all-powerful, Party Supernova, North Star, Lynchpin, Fulcrum, Vortex, Epicenter, Divining Rod, and Core of Chicago!!!  Owns and operates 7 Driving Ranges in Wisconsin.  Invented Custard. Coined the phrase "You're Killin' Me!!!"  When you see him, please scream at the top of your lungs to him, "YOU'RE KILLIN' ME!"

Virginia and Michelle (#12 and #16)
First TBOX: TBOX10 (2005)
Royal Qualifications: Last Year's Outstanding Interns; Came up to me at Taste of Randolph Street earlier that year, said "Chris, we'll do ANYTHING to get good numbers next year!"  Named TBOX Rookies of the Year in 2005; administered whippings to over 500 people who got too close to me with their official TBOX11 whips last year; each can chug a beer while standing on their heads;  Michelle enjoys baking and knitting (she knit me a sweater last year); Virginia enjoys gardening and won the Michigan State Largest Pumpkin competition in 2003

Tony Y. (#17)
First TBOX: TBOX1 (1996)
Royal Qualifications:  Former Number One at TBOX10;  absolutely regal, stately, and imperious in all his being; has been a great friend since 1993.  Likes to look away from the camera when having picture taken.  Gave me moral support during a low point in 1998 when I was thinking about retiring from bar-crawl planning.  Was one of only 11 people who came to the "Million Man Bar Crawl" in 1995.  Served as Military Governor of Guam, 1990-1993.  Has a hot cousin from Venezuela.  Forgave me when I almost killed him and gave him 8 stitches during a skiing collision in Colorado.  Threw himself in front of me during assassination attempt in 1999. Only Downside: White Sox Fan.

Brenda, Ellie, Sarah (#8,#9,#10)
First TBOX: TBOX8 (2003)
How They Got on the Royal Court: Lifetime Achievement, Enthusiasm, Great Costumes, un-ironic embracing of TBOX and all its glory!!!  I met them originally when we were next to each other during Hands Across America in a field in the middle of Kansas in the 80s; ran into them later in Chicago when I saw them on-stage in an all-female professional wrestling competition; they won the Iditarod dogsled race in 2004; and each has appeared multiple times on the Tonight Show

 

Fred (#2 for Life)
First TBOX: TBOX2 (1997)
Royal Qualifications: He is THE MAN; have been friends since 1994; bought my Toyota RAV-4 and hauled it away for 73 Cents; has been instrumental in planning of many previous TBOX's; originally came up with the idea, "WHY DON'T WE GET A BULLHORN??"; loves it when you say "WHO DOES NUMBER TWO WORK FOR??";  Ask him about the TBOX9 Badge Printing; knows every line from "Beerfest"; Number Two is the man!!!  Named "The Most Interesting Man in The World" by Glamour Magazine; starred in the movie FARGO.

Lindsay from Atlanta (#5)
First TBOX: TBOX8 (2003)
Royal Qualifications: Flies in from Atlanta every year; sent this picture from Atlanta art gallery explaining why she should be number 5;  promised to "duly represent" the city of Atlanta and Southern United States and "consume enough for the entire state of Georgia"; has giant tattoo of Axl Rose on her entire back (ask her to see it!); she is bringing a giant bushel of peaches with her to TBOX to pass out to the crowd!

Jenny (#15)
First TBOX: TBOX7 (2002)
Royal Qualifications: Lives in Naperville but still manages to be cool!  Has been WTW at every TBOX for the last 5 years; outstanding softball player;  cell phone number is ACTUALLY 867-5309 (seriously, call it!); plays the cello; was 1998 Wisconsin High School pole vault champion. (she will put on an exhibit at TBOX!!)

Joanna "Crazy Italian Chick from Park Ridge" (#11)
First TBOX: TBOX5 (2000)
Royal Qualifications: Rock Hard Abs.  You can bounce a quarter off 'em.

Teri (#37) and Kara (#28)
First TBOX: TBOX5 (2000)
Royal Qualifications:  Both Former Number 1's; Go Wire to Wire Every Year; HUGE Cubs Fans; Lovely, Charming, Warm, Caring, Supportive.  Helped me kick meth; both dated former Cub Kyle Farnsworth; have bailed me out of jail on number of occasions; Teri modeled our original XXS Bleacher Babe tank for us; Kara babysits my pet Komodo Dragon whenever I go out of town. They come from Southern Indiana, but have the intelligence and sophistication of people from... Northern Kentucky!

MEET THE ROYALS, Part Two
Here are some more members of this year's Royal Court!!!!  Get to know them... perhaps, one day, YOU may get to be on the Royal Court... you never know!!!

JD #13
First TBOX: TBOX2 (1997), FORMERNUMBER ONE (TBOX8, 2003)
Royal Qualifications:  He is the bulwark, the stalwart, the rock, the irresistible force, the immovable object, the Gibraltar, the Grand Canyon, the Everest, the Vesuvius, money in the bank, the one man you can always count on to be a pedal to the metal, b@@@s-to-the-wall supporter of and participant in TBOX!!!  and, he is known as THE UBIQUITOUS MR JEFF DAVIS!!!  He is also an expert Alligator Wrestler -- he worked in a sideshow in the Everglades to put himself through college -- and once landed a 747 at DFW airport with 186 people on board when both the pilot and co-pilot choked on Olives that they thought were pitted but actually had pits in them! 

Kelly M. #21
First TBOX: TBOX9
Royal Qualifications: She met me at the St. Michael's Block Party in June and said, "I will give you free beer, all weekend, if you will put me on the Royal Court!"  As if that alone would sway me (and of course no St Mike's volunteer would EVER actually do that) - after extensive background checking, we found that Kelly was just one heck of a wonderful all-american gal, with a very high credit score, she can open a beer bottle with her teeth, and she speaks fluent Bulgarian!

Tony F. #4
First TBOX: TBOX10, 2005
Royal Qualifications:  Knows how to get himself close to the centers of power;  served as caddy/apprentice/man-servant to TBOX10 #10 Tony Y. -- meteoric rise up the charts from #1264 to #19 to #4.  Calls me "Mr. Festa";  played AA ball, notching 13 wins and 128 K's for the Red Sox minor league organization in 2002 before tearing rotator cuff in a Shuffleboard Accident;  bench presses 425 lbs. Tore up the set of the O'Reilly Factor and banned from Fox News for life after on-air rumble with Geraldo Rivera

Harold #7
First TBOX: TBOX5 (2000)
Royal Qualifications:  Leads Boy Scout/Girl Scout Troops to TBOX; wears shorts in 25 degree weather;  brings his "A" game to every event, every year; lets people rub his head for good luck; once bowled a perfect game in a PBA tournament with a live falcon perched on his head.  Also, he can karate chop a brick in half with his bare hands like those Karate Guys - ask him, like after Bar 9 or so, he'll do it!!

Eric #18
First TBOX: TBOX9 (2004)
Royal Qualifications:  When I started the company and was at a couple of street fairs working at my booth all alone :(  he came and kept me company all day; twice gave me (and 11 of my lost friends) rides home from Navy Pier after the Forever Green party (I can't find my way around 312-land); played Middle Linebacker for the Carolina Panthers' in their inaugural game in 1995; has giant tattoo of Jessica Alba all across his entire chest; runs a 4.3 40.

Lauren from New York #19
First TBOX: TBOX10 (2005)
Royal Qualification:  Won last year's photo contest, 4 free TBOX tickets, and a spot on the Royal Court!!!  She's just as cute as a button; is a Mets fan, so I kind of felt sorry for her :O ; won the Bronze Medal in Synchronized Swimming in the 2000 Sydney Olympics; comes from Long Island, and Amy Fisher was actually her babysitter and taught her everything she knows; and she is a fantastic dancer, if you run into her, please ask her to do the Macarena, she will love it.

Melissa #22
First TBOX: TBOX11 (2006)
Royal Qualifications:  Well... she actually is one of the #1 clients of Festa T-Shirts, the owner of M2 Boutique at 3527 North Southport, a wonderful place to do all of your Christmas shopping!!!!  Oh, and she is just an absolute explosion of party energy, a dynamo, a whirling dervish, like the Tasmanian Devil after 6 Red Bulls, like eating an entire 2 pound bag of Skittles all at once in one big mouthful, while riding in the front car of the rollercoaster, with your hair on fire and scorpions crawling up your leg; she's stylish, elegant, and ladylike, but so crazy she'll melt your face if you get too close!!!

Nicole #39
First TBOX: TBOX11 (2006)
Royal Qualifications: She is just an outstanding young lady.  Has triple citizenship in the United States, Brazil, and Slovakia; speaks 7 languages; best soccer player in the greater Chicagoland area; can touch the tip of her nose with her tongue; won Indiana state girls 11-14 tetherball championship while in Junior High School.

ARE YOU GOING "WIRE TO WIRE"?????
We here at Festa Stuff Incorporated want to urge you heartily to go WIRE TO WIRE!!! -- that means, from BEGINNING TO END and to everything in between.  Sure, you can join in later, but it's fun to go all the way, hard-core, and to show our appreciation, we give you... WIRE! -- just don't eat it -- they're not twizzlers!!